Your flat, chubby nerdgirl friend was getting picked on so you stole something to giver her an edge, surely that's the end of things, right?

SCP-2747 of the SCP Foundation. "The anti-narrative named Anafabula the Lady of Black Thorns, who seeks to destroy this story."

She's the worst, but always wins no matter how hard you try!

She's just going to have to train you to be her good boi